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This Man Doesn't Think His Girlfriend Should Get A Tattoo... Is He In The Wrong?

These days, many people have tattoos. It's pretty common to see someone with not only one but multiple tattoos. Some people choose to only have a few, and some people like to go big. It's all personal preference in what someone wants to do with their bodies. With that being said, tattoos can make a big difference in a person's appearance. It can change the way they look forever. Does this mean that a tattooed person's significant other should have a say in what they get done? Everyone is going to have opinions, but tattoos can be pretty meaningful to a person. They can be a part of their identity.

This man ran into a problem when his girlfriend expressed wanting a new, big tattoo. Upon telling her he did not like the idea, things got heated. Now, this couple is in a situation where one wants something, but it may be at the expense of their relationship. Is this poster wrong for not wanting his girlfriend to do something she wants to do, or does this issue go deeper than tattoos? Keep reading to see the whole story and what other users thought.

Here's the original story

AmltheA Join Posted by Another Policy22. reddit Today she comes up to me brimming with excitement stating that she's getting the AITA for disagreeing with my girlfriend getting more tattoos? Me(31m) and my girlfriend (30f) have been together for 2 years. We love each other deeply and both believe that we are soulmates. I try my best to be supportive of everything that she does and all of her interests. My girlfriend had half a sleeve of tattoos when we started dating, I don't mind tattoos but feel like there's a limit where i find them to be a bit too much. She doesn't have that many and i love the ones that she has now. Tattoos are a big interest of hers and over the course of our relationship she has gotten another tattoo which I also supported and didn't mind, I was just happy that she liked it. Since then she has stated that she's very interested in getting one across her chest. I feel that such a tattoo would be a big change in appearance and I don't think it would look. I always respond that I'm not sure about such a tattoo. I understand that it's her body and that i have no say in what she does to it. tattoo that she's been talking about and asks me what i think about it. I tell her that it's her body and she can do whatever she likes, but I think that I prefer the amount of tattoos she has currently and that I don't think I would like the tattoo. I could tell that she was crushed with what i had to say with her emotions slowly changing from sadness to anger directed at me. She asked me how i would feel if she told me to stop enjoying one of my interests. I tell her that I love her more than anything in the world and I very much support her decision to do whatever she wants with her body, but that i think she would look better without it and that she has every right to disregard my opinion. Now she's p at me, ignoring and stonewalling me, telling me that she is very sad over what i said and that she wants to be left alone while glaring at me with cold eyes. I feel horrible for what I said. She won't even respond to me when I tell her that I love her and I don't know what to do. 573 upvotes Comment Copy link View 1024 comments

(Source: Reddit)

AITA for disagreeing with my girlfriend getting more tattoos? Me (31m) and my girlfriend (30f) have been together for 2 years. We love each other deeply and both believe that we are soulmates. I try my best to be supportive of everything that she does and all of her interests. My girlfriend had half a sleeve of tattoos when we started dating, I don't mind tattoos but feel like there's a limit where I find them to be a bit too much. She doesn't have that many and i love the ones that she has now.

Tattoos are a big interest of hers and over the course of our relationship she has gotten another tattoo which I also supported and didn't mind, I was just happy that she liked it.

Since then she has stated that she's very interested in getting one across her chest. I feel that such a tattoo would be a big change in appearance and I don't think it would look. I always respond that I'm not sure about such a tattoo. I understand that it's her body and that I have no say in what she does to it.

Today she comes up to me brimming with excitement stating that she's getting the tattoo that she's been talking about and asks me what I think about it. I tell her that it's her body and she can do whatever she likes, but I think that I prefer the amount of tattoos she has currently and that I don't think I would like the tattoo.

I could tell that she was crushed with what i had to say with her emotions slowly changing from sadness to anger directed at me. She asked me how i would feel if she told me to stop enjoying one of my interests. I tell her that I love her more than anything in the world and I very much support her decision to do whatever she wants with her body, but that I think she would look better without it and that she has every right to disregard my opinion.

Now she's p____ at me, ignoring and stonewalling me, telling me that she is very sad over what I said and that she wants to be left alone while glaring at me with cold eyes. I feel horrible for what I said. She won't even respond to me when I tell her that I love her and I don't know what to do.

So who is in the wrong here?

EsmeWeatherwax7a commented on post reddit I was fully prepared to call you the AH, but she's in "don't ask questions you don't want the answers to" territory. You feel how you feel and aren't trying to control her. You didn't tell her to stop enjoying her interests. You told her, under repeated prompting, that her interests were not the same as your interests. If you've been as openly respectful of her right to adorn her body however she chooses as you claim here, I don't know that there is anything else you can do except lie, and it's hard to see that as a long-term winning relationship strategy. NTA 465 upvotes 78 replies View 78 comments

(Source: Reddit)

Many people think he is, they're just tattoos, after all

Miserable_Dentist_70 commented on post reddit This is you telling us how you are super supportive of everything she does. while not doing that. Just stop talking about yourself as if you're doing something you're not doing. She asked you what you thought and you told her. Nothing wrong with that. Just admit to yourself that the tattoos are important to you and that you do care about the tattoos. This whole post is just textbook cognitive dissonance. YTA. If you support her then you do, and if the tattoos are a problem they are. Just be honest about which is actually true. 385 upvotes 11 replies View 11 comments

(Source: Reddit)

Also, a very good point

Hystadvice commented on post reddit YTA why start dating a woman with tattoos if you don't like tattoos on women? You're entitled to your opinions and preferences obviously, but you can't expect your partner to conform to them especially when you clearly knew she liked tattoos from the beginning. 226 upvotes 108 replies. View 108 comments

(Source: Reddit)

It's conditional, I guess

andromache97 commented on post reddit idk how you can believe this is not TA thing to say to your "soulmate" whose hobby is tattoos I think that I prefer the amount of tattoos she has currently and that I don't think I would like the tattoo. "soulmate" lol YTA 155 upvotes 8 replies. View 8 comments

(Source: Reddit)

At least he was honest?

Bhaastsd commented on post reddit On the surface, NTA. She asked, you answered. But I do wonder if this is the first time she's been made aware of your dislike of tattoos. If it's something you've kept hidden then YTA for not being honest early in the relationship when you could've had an honest discussion about tattoos and what it would mean for the future. If you're just bringing it up now it smacks of dishonesty. 72 upvotes 3 replies View 3 comments

(Source: Reddit)

He'd be in trouble either way

IntendedHero commented on post ❤reddit NTA I like tattoos as well, but like yourself not a huge fan of the chest piece. She asked, you answered. If this came up 3 months after she got it you'd be in s for lying. Better to be in s for being honest. 66 upvotes 0 replies. View more on Reddit

(Source: Reddit)

This could be a compatibility thing…

TheBerethian commented on post reddit NTA You're allowed to have preferences. You're not stopping her getting what she wants, just expressing yourself. But you both need to have a direct conversation if you want your relationship to continue. 56 upvotes 3 replies View 3 comments

(Source: Reddit)

Just certain tattoos, it seems

thisismyburnerac commented on post reddit YTA. You've been together 2 years and it sounds like you never really told her you had a thing about tattoos. You've certainly had the opportunity before now because she's certainly discussed getting more tattoos before now. 8 upvotes 5 replies View 5 comments

(Source: Reddit)

Oof

EbbWilling7785 commented on post reddit I reckon you're just not compatible. The 2 year relationship milestone usually brings that to the forefront. NAH 2 upvotes 0 replies View more on Reddit

(Source: Reddit)

True…

Grassy TreesAndLakes commented on post reddit NTA you wernt hiding your feelings about tattoos, you didnt mind the amounts she had. You were honest that you wernt into that type of tattoo. You didn't mislead her. Even people into tattoos might not like their partner having one on their chest, or neck, or face or w.e. 4 upvotes 0 replies View more on Reddit

(Source: Reddit)

Placement makes a difference

Emperor_High_Ground commented on post reddit NTA I don't understand everyone claiming you should've known what would happen just cause she already had tattoos. There's a huge difference in styles, coverage, placement, and more that factor into people's preferences for tattoos. I have 5 and plan to get more, but I have always disliked full chest pieces. There's no logical correlation between her having a half sleeve and then getting her entire chest done. She asked and you answered honestly and politely. And if she is actually the one, then her deciding to get her chest done will just end up being an adjustment period and nothing more. 18 upvotes 1 reply View 1 comments

(Source: Reddit)

The top commenting is hard to argue with

daisukidesu1981 commented on post reddit Why do people like you do this? Why do you pick a person for who they are and get mad when they continue to be that way? She did ask, but if you've always lied about how you really feel about her tattoos, even by omission, she was probably expecting a nicer response. Now she's learned you are deceptive and hiding your true opinion and she's thinking on that. Plus, you ruined her joy. Again, she asked but she probably didn't expect you to s all over her excitement so she's dealing with two hits at once. Maybe don't date women who have a penchant for permanent body modification if you don't like those types of things? 1.7K upvotes 138 replies View 138 comments

(Source: Reddit)

Yeah…

Mean_Zucchini1037 commented on post reddit My issue is she already HAD several tattoos and half a sleeve. Chances are she'll get more eventually. It's not like she had none when they met. YTA 1.1K upvotes 88 replies View 88 comments

(Source: Reddit)

Maybe it has nothing to do with the tattoos…

LocaCapone commented on post reddit My husband is covered in tattoos. He even has face tattoos. I hate the tattoos, love the husband. I had no intention of falling in love with the husband. Still love him and take good care of him tho. Doesn't sound like OP is mad rather his girlfriend is. 126 upvotes 8 replies. View 8 comments

(Source: Reddit)



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